Today, we’d like to introduce you to Hals Smedstad.
Thank you so much for sharing your story and insight with our readers. To kick things off, can you tell us a bit about how you got started?
Thank you for having me! Well, I was born and raised in Metro Detroit, where I grew up constantly around music. My parents put me onto a bunch of music which I’m thankful, as an adult, to have been immersed in as a child – The Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendrix, Norah Jones, Amy Winehouse, Ella Fitzgerald, The White Stripes, Replacements, Bob Marley, and hundreds of others.
My parents, like I know many others, always cherished the idea of having a ‘musical family.’ My dad is definitely a lot more musical than my mom; he played trumpet and marched growing up and taught me how to read music on a treble staff when I was very young. I struggled a lot with reading and writing when I was younger, always trying to do everything backward (we guess because of my left-handedness.) So, trying to apply a lot of those concepts to music, which is like a language of its own, was very overwhelming. My dad was always there to help me work through whatever challenge it was.
He got me my first guitar then when I was about 7 (which was a hot pink Daisy Rock guitar,) and he also got me my first really nice guitar as an adult (a Mahogany Solid Top Sawtooth Dreadnought with Fishman Presys Pickup/Preamp System). I was a troublemaker growing up and didn’t have a perfect childhood- I know none of us ever do. It took a few years after moving out at 18 to really come to understand my parents are people just like me and like everyone else’s parents. I dealt with a lot of these struggles universal to many youths.
Untreated ADHD, anxiety, and depression. I remember all of 2008 and lived in Detroit- a lot of my friend’s parents got laid off and my parents weren’t any different. It caused turbulence in an already rocky household, and I think suppressing a lot of these experiences and feelings led me to retaliate a bit as I got older. I quit guitar lessons pretty early, as I could never sit down long enough to practice. I was always getting in trouble for being too chatty or distracting in school, habituating my well-earned seat right by the teacher just about every year.
Middle school came along, and I had been playing horn for years by this point (Clarinet and Tenor Saxophone.) I was truly in love with woodwinds. I couldn’t have cared less about any other subject. I first started playing the Clarinet when I was 9, and the school music classes couldn’t move fast enough to keep up with my curiosity and creative flame. I remember devouring my books, and getting next year’s book before that year was even through.
I made a ‘secret’ middle school band blog with anonymous critiques for the group leading up to MSBOA solo & ensemble competitions. I can recall the day I took my first improvised solo in Jazz Band when I was 11, painting every detail around me and feeling the same butterflies and adrenaline coursing through my veins that I’ve rediscovered- Amazed and astonished by the capabilities within me. Something I never knew I had- capability.
It was also around then I really started honing in my tone and style, and also began transposing music by my ear. I think that’s when it all really started to click. “I could also make music that wasn’t classical.” My band director then, Holly Haffner, did a great job facilitating musical experiences that would endure the test of time, encouraging kids to continue their love for music beyond academics. I remember learning Dynamite by Taio Cruz on the piano because she had us play it, and our piano player was almost sick. We also played Rolling In The Deep, Crazy Train, Smoke on the Water, and many other very memorable songs.
This got gears moving inside my head for sure. I remember the first album I just tore through on my clarinet was ‘Songs About Jane,’ (2002) by Maroon 5. That year, when I was 12, I applied for a scholarship to attend Blue Lake Fine Arts Camp and got one that covered most of the cost – still, it was too expensive for my family. I wish I could have understood the complexities of adulthood and its’ challenges then because I think that it was the financial barrier to elevating my musical skills that really began to brew resentment towards my parents.
At the time, I went to school in Warren Consolidated Schools, which was poorly rated relative to the rest of the state. The district over, Troy School District, however, was highly rated and appealed to my parents through the possibility of paving an avenue to easier college admissions, more scholarships, and a better future overall. We took part in a “School of Choice” lottery, and my younger sister and I got in. The following year, we would transfer and the band director there was far more cold, uninspiring, and strict than my former. In my opinion, he was everything that is wrong with the Public Education Music System today.
This hostile classroom environment, combined with resentment for my parents, really set me off on a bad foot playing in this new atmosphere. I tried to be persistent with passion but honestly began getting involved with drama and the kids who were having sex and drinking. One day, some kids sitting in the rows behind me in a band teased me for being interested in the Marching Band the next year, topping off the roast with an insult about my mustache. Not only was I having a tough time ignoring bullying in the band, I had no teacher to turn to anymore- Certainly not a welcoming one. Someone who could create an atmosphere of trust, vulnerability, and confidence. I still face those challenges today, and wonder how it might have been different with a teacher more like Mrs. Haffner. That was my last straw, and I told my parents I did not want to play music anymore.
The next 10 years capitulates all of the trials, triumphs, and tribulations that would lead me to where I am right now. I went through everything in the books I’d read through my Psychology undergraduate. The insecurity, self-loathing, depression, anxiety, body dysphoria, gender dysphoria, alcoholism, drug dependency, interpersonal dependency, abusive relationships, self-exploitation, and destruction… the list could go on forever. I recently wrote a song that will appear on my upcoming debut album, called “The Cuckoo Still Sings,” where I play “the most fun I ever had was on a nosedive to rock bottom-” and to an extent, it’s true.
I wouldn’t repeat any of the mistakes I made, but I wouldn’t re-dp them either. Without them, I couldn’t guarantee I’d have any of the same people, accomplishments, or psychospiritual transformations that occurred as a result of those mistakes. Mistakes led me to run away halfway through my undergrad studies. Those mistakes also led me to some incredible friends who do incredible things like act, dog mush in the Iditarod race, chefs in magical places, Grand Canyon Park rangers and firefighters, and more.
I made these friends on one of the most magical adventures I’ve ever had, hiking 800 miles from the U.S.-Mexico border, in Arizona, to Utah, via the Arizona National Scenic Trail. I learned incredible things about myself out there, even with a lousy traveling companion (who you can also learn and laugh about with me on the album!) Most importantly, I learned you could really discover stuff about yourself out there (I mean in nature.) I learned you didn’t need riches to experience incredible, vast, beauty- I mean REAL heaven on Earth.
Fast forward less than five years and I don’t even recognize the person that hiked thousands of miles, but not without hitting the big-red-self-destruction button, in 2021. In between the Instagram posts, fabricating a ‘put-together facade’, I was picking up cigarettes in parking lots throughout the ‘trail towns’ because I had gotten so drunk one night that I lost my entire wallet while conveniently on the other side of the country, and could not go without smoking. My nicotine addiction was so severe that I’d sometimes smoke in my sleep and nearly start fires.
My cough would keep my whole trail family up many nights and contributed to quite a few grumpy mornings. One night, one of my friends shouted from the other tent “Blisters, PLEASE take some Benadryl or something.” I couldn’t stop coughing, and while it was due in part to allergies, a cough that scary is NOT a part of my allergic reactions anymore. I could barely regulate my emotions, as I never really had time to physiologically recover from the abuse I was doing to my body, from smoking to drinking to walking the length of several marathons a day for weeks on end. Depending on the angle, those stories can seem marvelous or nightmarish.
The main difference now is that the person I am today does not poison themself. I do not smoke tobacco. I don’t do drugs. I don’t drink. I eat five fruits or veggies a day, and I try to keep my mind sharp. Most importantly, today I go to the woods, or the desert, or what have you, to find myself. I seek to understand myself better when I go away by being truly alone with my thoughts, whereas the person I was then only sought to get away from who they really were when no one else was around.
This past December, I celebrated two years of sobriety by spending 16 hours at a non-profit music venue, Four Star Theatre, in Grand Rapids, working a music benefit that I organized (in just under 4-weeks) to support the humanitarian efforts in Gaza, by raising almost $2,000 for UNICEF and Doctors without Borders. Two years ago, I don’t think I would have been okay celebrating anything, anywhere but a bar – let alone by doing things to better humanity.
We all face challenges, but looking back, would you describe it as a relatively smooth road?
It certainly has not been the smoothest of roads! It reminds me of trying to take my 2003 Honda Odyssey down the ever-winding “4WD Clearance-Only” roads through Big Bend National Park- pestered by a constant alarming rattle, with each minute passing spiking my heart rate another 15 BPM and loosening about a dozen mystery nuts and bolts throughout the van’s frame. Can you believe I got five flat tires on that trip in just 6 months?
That was certainly a roadblock. More seriously, but still on the topic of roads, was my OWI in 2021, just days after returning from Arizona. I was homeless pretty much after abandoning my lease to go live in my van, and I had no choice but to live with my boyfriend at the time, who was abusive in many capacities. I tell people often that if you follow my path, it will unfold for you exactly as it did for me. I went out West without intention, like I said, and I was running from myself and the issues I had, which were actively destroying my life.
Upon returning, I got pulled over for speeding on my way home from a college party on Memorial Day Weekend. I had so many opportunities to stay home that night, and today, I would have taken any of those options in a heartbeat- especially if I could have predicted the consequences, though we never can. Even then, I had just as many opportunities to stay the night or get a ride- as I did many other nights. I was desperate to try anything despite the risk, especially if it meant gaining just a slight illusion of control. (F.Y.I- You can’t numb while maintaining control of anything).
Ultimately, it was just another domino in a series that would drag me to my absolute rock bottom. It’s a long way down, and an even longer way back up. It was more work at the beginning than any other point in my journey so far, in getting sober, spiritually and mentally fit, and learning to listen to and take care of my body, among other things. I started by attending AA and Buddhist-Based recovery meetings, did CBT and EMDR therapy extensively twice a week for many months, and took months off working, school, and pretty much anything that could cause stress.
This was not without any kicking and screaming. Throughout all my poor decisions, there was a world of delusion that I had propped around me, lie by lie, often from people who I thought I loved, and who I thought loved me. I was falling apart, but I would never admit it because my self-awareness was so lacking that I didn’t even recognize it myself. Everyone wanted to help me, and I couldn’t even see it- despite all the extenuating circumstances. The anguish and volatility of my living and interpersonal situations at the time led to some really escalated conflicts, fueled by the rage of alcohol, and no reconciliation on either side.
I was led to believe I was the sole problem, and honestly got into recovery to try and keep my abusive ex in my life. It’s incredibly ironic because the first thing sobriety and the recovery community pointed out to me was that the most menacing threat to my life, sanity, and future was him- And there I was, trying SO hard to hold on. It was honestly a really confusing time. It shook my core to learn that people weren’t always out to get you, most people are relatively good people, there’s no true things such as scarcity or competition, along with many other realities of living a happy and healthy life – or at least a sane one.
Letting go of my habits of destructive thoughts and behavioral patterns felt like it was killing me. I had crumbled and had no choice but to forgive bygones with my family, learn to love them and myself, be honest, learn meditation and mindfulness, and above all, decompress. For about 6 months following what I think of as the last ‘little catastrophe’ (which entailed the romantic fallout, having to get a PPO against him, taking a medical withdrawal from school, losing my housing, and relapsing after my first 3-months of sobriety,) I took a ~6-month period to just decompress.
Each day, I woke up, made sure I ate breakfast, did yoga, meditated, and journaled about some serious introspective DBT therapy-type-shit, read, and played music for about 8-10 hours. I tell people all the time that music really did save my life. Music was a gift to me, and because it saved my life, I want to keep that gift giving for others. Sometimes, if people are too insistent I take a drink now (after almost 3 years of sobriety,) I tell them, almost jokingly, that I’ll ‘Amy Winehouse’ myself. While it sucks, I have to make a joke out of something not funny to me at all. It sucks more that people seem to have completely forgotten she died of Alcohol overdose – not some other controlled substance.
It happens to thousands of people a year, a lot of the time college kids or people in recovery who relapse. I wish Amy had the opportunities to heal that I was privileged to have, that’s a huge inspiration for starting Lioness, an Amy Winehouse tribute I’ve been working on. Overall, I think it’s safe to say the road has been anything but smooth. In fact, it’s still a battle. I’m still learning everyday how to dismantle old behaviors and beliefs that don’t serve me anymore (you know, the toxic ones we all latch onto time-to-time for survival,) and replacing them with mindfulness practices. In a lot of capacities, I feel like a newborn. I don’t have a ton of practice putting others before myself, or with patience.
I’ve found in sobriety though, that these practices are key to cultivating a life that promotes abundance and success for not just yourself, but those around you, and whoever is surrounding them. It was much easier to dissociate and remove myself from positions where I would have to be there for my loved ones. It’s hard to be present. It hurts sometimes. Still, I’d rather learn to deal with the pain, so that I can appreciate the outcome of growth within myself and my community.
It’s been great being able to be there for my parents, siblings, and friends in a way I never was able to be before. I try to take every opportunity to help others, whether it’s through non-profit involvement or small acts of kindness. It’s also incredible that I can create artistic experiences with an amazing community, making music that carries those misfortunes and messages, reminding folks that they aren’t alone.
We’d be interested to hear your thoughts on luck and what role, if any, you feel it’s played for you.
One of my favorite Spiritual writers and thinkers, Deepak Chopra, asserts that luck is a term utilized by people who do not understand that opportunities, which may appear to be coincidental, are not random but instead, the phenomenon of intention and preparedness intersecting.
I found that when we reduce the good or bad things that happen to us to ‘luck,’ we lose the mental space otherwise available to conceptualize the cause-and-effect components of said situation. I could say that it was bad luck that led me to get pulled over in 2021, contributing to the slippery slope of my fall to rock-bottom. I just don’t believe that’s true given that was the direct consequence of my dangerous decisions, to not just myself but those around me. I could also say that it was good luck that when I started learning guitar again, I learned quickly.
I could say it was good luck that the musicians I made friends with when I began immersing myself in the Michigan music scene, were some of the greatest musicians in the state. Well, my car insurance is still super expensive years later, I haven’t signed any recording or distribution deals, and honestly putting myself in those circles of wicked talented musicians was very uncomfortable at times. I think that the thing about luck is that it relies on unrealistic angles.
Angles can be paramount to making paradigms work for our circumstances, but they can also be detrimental to our success if we fail to acknowledge reality. I had been meaning to get back around to playing music again just before getting in trouble, and while it was unclear at the time, I think that series of unfortunate events was exactly what I needed to get back into music, and to do so purposefully. Furthermore, I didn’t learn that quickly. Remember when I mentioned I took all that time off to learn how to be a human again?
I’m not sure if this was the way to do it, but I definitely fit about 3 years of practicing guitar everyday into one year of practicing guitar every day. I was obsessed with learning my instrument, my musical style, and my passions. It was much better than being obsessive over drinking and other patterns of self-destruction I had grown accustomed to. I think it was refreshing for some of the friends I’d soon make within that music community to see someone my age learning, so enamored with the processes, and so eager to get more experience.
I’d like to think it’s also been as wholesome for those folks as it has been for me to see someone grow from a novice to an intermediate musician in just a couple of years, enabling them to overcome circumstances that could have ended them. It’s not lucky that I attracted incredible people into my life, who want to promote those environments for learning, creating, and encouraging sobriety and community. I think like-minded people are drawn to each other, and I don’t feel lucky, but I do feel incredibly grateful that I’ve been able to grow into someone who is capable of doing those things.
It’s a wonderful feeling to destroy your own demons, especially with the help of creativity. Now, I have the most incredible, supportive, and healthy relationship ever- and I am working with that person to create a whole album of songs that traverse this entire personal transformation of mine. I also feel deeply grateful that I can recreate the music of Amy Winehouse, someone whose music really resonated with my internal conflicts during early sobriety.
It’s awesome that I can pay homage to a huge inspiration for me in that field with some of my best friends while also supporting recovery and harm reduction in my own community through supporting local non-profits through our performances. To me, the Lioness: Amy Winehouse Tribute that I am working on right now is the best way for my story to come full circle.
If Amy had won her battle against addiction, I’m confident that she would be using her platform and art to spread similar messages of perseverance, self-love, and advocacy that we are holding close to our hearts throughout this project.
Thanks – so, what else should our readers know about your work and what you’re currently focused on?
I mentioned I play a wide variety of music- mostly Americana music, which can broadly range from bluegrass, to Jazz, Folk, and Blues, and more. I love to add a little sprinkle of some elements found in 90s acoustic and Alternative Rock music. My indie music influence definitely makes appearances in some of my tunes from time to time as well.
Within the scopes of songwriting and performing, I generally stay within the Americana genre, focusing my energy on Old Country sounds, Jazz, Soul, and Folk music. My style of songwriting weaves sensibilities of timelessness through complex, intertextual allusions in lyricism, resonant melodies, and employing a broad range of raw expressions of the human experience. Overall, I think my music catalog is one of those ‘there’s something for everyone,’ situations!
For that primary Americana project I mentioned, Red Thyme, we are recording our first album right now and expect to release it sometime near the end of Summer! The Amy Winehouse tribute project is also going to be a really great time. We have over 2 hours of her material prepped, and are partnering with Grand Rapids Red Project to help reduce drug and blood-borne dangers that threaten our community. They offer resources for HIV/AIDS and Hepatitis treatment and testing, recovery coaching, free Narcan, and other disposables to reduce drug-related harm. A portion of proceeds from each show will be donated directly to them, and we’ll be working together for advocacy and promotion!
On a personal note, I just graduated from GVSU with my B.S. in Psychology this past weekend. I am substitute teaching, mostly in Special Education and Music classrooms, and I’m beginning to consider future plans to obtain a teaching certificate so I can work in my own classroom, and create space for students that I wish all teachers held growing up. I still admire professors who are able to sympathize with students’ needs while teaching effectively- it played a huge factor in my success this semester. I dream of being able to create that for future students, and would love to teach music someday!
For now, make sure you follow my personal and band social media accounts so you can stay updated on album release, show dates, and other fun surprises. Thanks again for having me!
Booking inquiries & finding my music –
Contact Info:
- Website: http://linktr.ee/halssings
- Instagram: http://instagram.com/halssings
- Other: http://linktr.ee/redthymeofficial
- Email: halssings@gmail.com
- Links: https://redthy.me
- Instagram: @halssings @redthymemusic @lioness.experience
- Red Thyme Booking: redthymemusic@gmail.com
- Links: http://linktr.ee/redthymeofficial
- Lioness:An Amy Winehouse Experience Booking halssings@gmail.com
- Links: http://linktr.ee/lionessexperience
Image Credits
Sarah Bidgood (@sarah.bidgood), @TipTop by Erin Skryzpek (@skrz.photo), and Mod Bettie
