Today, we’d like to introduce you to Rachel Phillips.
Hi Rachel, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today.
My journey started while I was getting my doctorate. I remember being constantly told what I couldn’t do and what many failed to do (along with the usual scare tactics towards students). As I got used to the heavy caseload and pressure of my doctorate, I remember being angry that I was constantly being told that I had to be miserable in the field, you couldn’t be happy or pretty in the field, shouldn’t travel in law school, and that you shouldn’t have hobbies outside of school.
In other words, your life is school. I remember that in one class speech, it was acknowledged that women were treated more harshly than men, and we had to fight harder because of our gender. If we wanted families, then we better learn to balance family and 60-hour work weeks with a job that probably lacked boundaries of fairness and work hour limits. If that made us uncomfortable, then we were told to reconsider the profession. Unfortunately, working one of my first office jobs, I realized this was true.
Women were screamed at more by clients, degraded for having emotions, yet given more work with clients because they had emotions. This was the complete opposite of my undergrad experience, where Western Michigan University (undergrad programs) let students essentially do whatever they wanted as long as they were respectful of the school and others. Students were taught to acknowledge others with respect, explore and experience life, try new things, and network within the community.
It was the second semester during law school when I woke up and really wanted to show women in the higher education professions that we can do it all and that we are allowed to have lives outside our work lives, which doesn’t make us less valuable. One day, I started doing more things for me. Started recording in the gym. Started showing tips for time management and case reading. Things like that. As I started to date more, I made a TikTok to give some comic relief to those who were also struggling.
My next motivation came when I started taking CrossFit more seriously. Learning new skills, becoming stronger, and starting to compete was an adrenaline rush. It gave me life. Posting my journey on Instagram started off to show my progress as an athlete, but as I got more and more into it, receiving toxic training and experiencing toxic gyms, I really wanted to use my Instagram as a way to show others that they don’t have to put up with trainers who teach their bros or favorites and that a certain clique in the should not ruin the sport for you.
The more I posted and gave honest opinions, the more people came forward, and I connected with them. So, I made it a point to show women that they can do it all. I tried to be as transparent as possible with everything.
Alright, let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall, and if not, what challenges have you had to overcome?
What is a smooth road? Ha. First off, my degree was always a struggle, especially when I was told by professors and many in the field that the field is miserable, it’s purposely miserable, all people in the field do that to make money/feed their egos, and I need to be OK with being miserable. No one should make their lives work to be miserable.
While I was getting my doctorate, one of my handwritten assignments caught the attention of a professor. When we went over the pop quiz, my answer essentially looked like it was written in hieroglyphics. Not to mention, trying to pay attention in class, memorize anything, and take notes was an absolute nightmare. I am thankful that the professor stepped up because it led to addressing a learning disability (I had ignored) or two that get worse with stress.
Between that, the harshness of the curriculum, and addressing an eating disorder that came and went since high school, law school was a struggle. Your mental health definitely takes a hit in the doctorate degrees. There are very few positive things compared to the negative, and there is a constant/habitual mindset that “If I suffered then you need to suffer”, pledging essentially. But the more I was able to get those two things under control, the more I was able to add activities and push myself to do more. It pushed me to really prioritize and learn time management.
Also, one thing that I struggled with was being an “Adult.” When you take on a master’s or doctorate degree, your life takes a pause. Others don’t understand why you haven’t moved out, gotten married, or done any of the big grown-up steps we are supposed to take. You can’t afford to do anything because loans and tuition have you.
Finally, dating is a complete disaster. I started dating seriously two years ago, and the dating pool definitely has pee in it. Everyone is a MESS. I cannot tell you the letdown of waiting to date seriously, thinking other serious professionals did the same thing. The joke is on me. Dating nowadays is everyone is getting out of their first marriage or doing round 2 of their 20s and just wanting to continue the hookup culture.
There is no waiting for monogamy. Most singles are baited on dating apps for felons, swingers, cheaters, and narcissists. The apps that were supposed to help the dating scene are now hunting grounds for felons, swingers, cheaters, and narcissists. Those dating disasters are what started my TikTok page: amplify. My Instagram is for fitness and life. My TikTok is for a single life. The real kicker is spending your 20s bettering yourself, getting into a career, establishing what you want in a relationship, and making sure you’ll be ready for a serious relationship when you’re ready.
It really is a mental struggle going through the cycle of putting yourself out there and having the following outcomes: roster dating, someone just wanting to hookup, cheating, saying they want a relationship but then changing their mind, or my personal trending favorite being baited by someone to be a “unicorn” for a couple (the new predatory behavior seen in the dating apps). That has been one of my biggest personal struggles is the constant putting forth all the effort, working on my communication, putting work into myself, being loyal, and sacrificing my time from my normal activities to end up in a situation where the guy is cheating or not willing to do 1% of the effort I put forth.
My most recent ex played the part of a “Perfect” long-distance boyfriend. He was constantly communicating, making it work, and seeing each other every weekend at his hockey games until one random day, he decided that he wanted someone else. My friends in Fort Wayne caught him cheating on an app. He wasn’t going to call me or tell me. I had to beg for a phone call, to which he was extremely disrespectful. After months of getting to know him, more months of talking (we met a Royal Oak Beats and Eats), physical attraction, all political and family views lining up, interests the same, months of actually having a label, he was done with me. No warning or clue. That was absolutely terrible.
This was after a previous relationship where the guy did a similar behavior. Mentally, getting out of that place to be able to even make a social media post was hard. As cheesy as this sounds, my best friend Kat, my CrossFit gym, my work, and even some of my online friends mentally picked me up and really helped me remember who I am. I owe them a lot for that.
Appreciate you sharing that. What else should we know about what you do?
By day, I am a paralegal. However, by night, I am a creator.
The point of rmplift on instagram is show my journey as an athlete, post funny memes, uplift others, show others that you’re allowed to have a career and a life, and honestly, shed light on the secret toxicity of “Bro Crossfit gyms”. It was also to shed light on how we are taught that we only get to do one thing in life, and that should be our focus. I post to help show that you are not stuck where you are. You are allowed to wonder, to have hobbies, YOU ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE A LIFE!
On TikTok, I share my shenanigans about being a single feral gremlin. I share my horror stories and some comedy to help those who are also alone in this disastrous time of dating.
What sets me apart is that I am brutally honest, but I also believe in people, even if they’re strangers. I say things that should be said, but most won’t because it hurts feelings, or they don’t want the backlash. I don’t sugarcoat things or protect those who purposely ruin CrossFit or dating for others. I am a hot mess express, and I invite others to be weird, honest, and adventurous with me.
How do you think about luck?
For some odd reason, I’m always in a place and time where things are happening, or something happens that I know my followers will love or resemble. Other than that, I don’t know if luck has been on my side.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://linktr.ee/Rmplift
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rmplift/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Rmplift
- Other: https://www.amazon.com/shop/influencer-d94d54cd
Image Credits
Rachel Riedal
